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Create Balance by prioritizing your passions

11/23/2014

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By Michael Kline
as published in Conway Daily Sun


Sometimes we have a hard time even naming our passions, much less prioritizing them. Let’s face it, between work, family and keeping up the house, cars and appointments, who has time to worry about their passions?!  Stop. Slow down a moment - life should be easier than this. When we experience joy in our life, it is a sign that we are living in alignment with our purpose and passion. Sometimes it is easier to ride the horse in the direction it is already going. Why do we fight with life, always pushing in opposite directions? How do we arrange things so that life isn’t so stressful, so we can feel a sense of balance and calm – at least once in a while?

I want you to be as least as happy as I am. I live a dream life. I may not have as much time and money as some, but I enjoy more personal and financial freedom than most. For the most part I get to do what I want, when I want and with whom I want. I think of myself as one of the happiest people I know. You want to know my secret? I follow my passions. What does that even mean?!

Kathleen Seeley, a trainer/speaker friend from British Columbia, introduced me to The Passion Test. The book, the test, the videos, the now world-famous program of The Passion Test was created by Janet and Chris Attwood. I had seen them in magazines and on Facebook - I even clicked their link once and watched the online video – now I get emails daily promoting the many benefits. I get too many emails promoting the benefits of too many things, so until Kathleen explained it to me in person, it was lost on me. What a game-changer when you sit down for a half-hour and actually pay attention to this process! I’ve done the test several times now, and I’ve taught it a number of times. Each time I learn something new. Finally, I can sort out the tension between family time, work time, travel time, friend time, hobby time. I can balance (eliminate) the pressure to be doing the things other people think I should be doing and the stress of trying to present myself as others expect me to be. Can one exercise do all that? Frankly no, but The Passion Test does all that if you combine it with the other personal work we talk about in this column on a regular basis. This is one very important tool for helping you decide what you really want in life, which is where many of us get stuck settling for less than the life we deserve.

The first several times I did the Passion Test, I discovered that the quality and nature of the work I do is far more important to me than the actual work itself. For instance, I would rather do generic work with people I like, than do amazing work by myself. I am a pack animal and I simply do not thrive while working by myself. Having financial security is more important to me than where I live. But, where I live is more important to me than having more financial abundance than I already have. These subtle nuances change everything in how I look at my options. I discovered that relationships are far more important to me than my work or finances. My health and wellbeing comes ahead of everything. Mind you, these are not choices where we do not get to have all the above. These are exercises in self-awareness and knowing our passions in each area of our life. The more we can bring our natural passion and talent into each area of our life, the more successful we will be. The test can be applied to any single area of goal setting. Recently, I was lucky enough to be participating in a private retreat in Jack Canfield’s Santa Barbara estate. Jack is something of a genius with this work, so as I’m sitting on his living room sofa, (mostly hoping I won’t spill wine on it), I might have begun to think I was over-analyzing this passion stuff. Jack invited me to use the test just to prioritize specific projects within my area of work. What seemed like a small shift in perspective gave way to a massive change in how I see my work and the role I serve for my client companies . Magic happens when you can list your top 5 passions in order, and rate how present they are in your life at this moment. Only then, can you bring them more into all areas of your life in the future.

I implore you, go online and learn about the test, buy the book, or call me for a private test. Maybe you could pull together your friends, partners or employees and would could to do a group test. The important thing is that you have clarity around your passions and you give yourself permission to be honest about your priorities and plan your life accordingly. Your career, family, relationships, finances, health, spirituality and legacy are important topics not to be left to chance.


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  How to identify your life’s purpose

11/5/2014

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By Michael Kline
as published in Conway Daily Sun


When we have clarity around our purpose, all our decisions become easier. We can focus; we no longer suffer from shiny-object syndrome. We can say “no” to that which is not for us. The “yeses” we say suddenly have much more meaning. The trouble is most people do not know what their real passion is. I was one such person until just a few years ago. I accepted it as just the way I was. I was envious of others who had a real passion whether it was for a hobby like golf or hockey, but I especially found myself envious of people who had a real passion for their work. Don’t get me wrong, I have loved every job I’ve done for at least the last twenty years. I pursued every new challenge with passion and enthusiasm, but I often wondered – does that make it my passion? I did not think so. I began to wonder if my passion was starting small businesses, or helping other people start small businesses. I knew for sure I could not succinctly identify my passion, and if you told me I had to pick one thing to do for the rest of my working life, I would not be able to choose in my forties any better than I did when I was in college. Do you know what you want to be when you grow up?

Several years ago, my partner Sal gave me a book that promised to help identify my passion. After a few chapters, I realized the book was using numerology to tell me what I should be doing with my life. I tossed the book aside. After Sal got into the book and was having fun following the exercises, I agreed to “run the numbers”. The book led me on a path of self-reflection, which was helpful and it did the numbers-thing. Both told me I was a teacher in my heart. I never had any fantasies about being a teacher in the traditional sense, but something about sharing and connecting with people in a learning environment resonated with me. (I forget the name of the book and having lent it out, I no longer have it. We have since discovered better tools anyway). I had enjoyed my days as a corporate trainer and my volunteer work teaching workshops for S.C.O.R.E., chamber of commerce events and the like. Almost immediately, Kline Seminars was born. Now what? How would this be different from our other small businesses? How would the passion shine through in any meaningful, life-purpose way?

One of my favorite exercises to help identify one’s passions and purpose is creating the Life Purpose statement. To complete your life purpose statement will require a little bit of homework. I have shared this work with over 500 local adult students in small groups over the last two years. I have yet to find anyone ready to answer the questions off the top of their heads. The good news is, in about an hour, nearly everyone can clearly articulate a life-purpose statement that feels right to them. The questions are simple:

  1. What are two of your top character strengths that resonate with your most? We are looking for things like Creativity, or Tenacity, or Ingenuity, or Enthusiasm, Optimism, Sense of Fairness, etc. In positive Psychology, there are 24 such strengths that are measurable and for which we can easily test and rank in order of strength. I strongly recommend a simple twenty minute test that can help you identify and articulate your top strengths – it might be something you would never have thought of. My most consistent strength is my Capacity to Love and Be Loved. Wow, how do you put that on a resume? By trusting the process, it turns out it is the most valuable strength to have in my line of work!

  2. What are two things you love to do – that you are in a state of “flow” when you do them? Anything from solving problems for clients to playing with grand-children, or playing golf. Anything. For me, I am totally lost in the moment when I’m teaching, ideally when my students leave feeling inspired.

  3. Describe your vision of a better world – you get to define it – your world, your community, the planet earth – you decide. I want everyone to flourish – (to enjoy positive emotions, engagement, positive relationships, meaningful lives and achievement).

Now string these three questions into a sentence and you have a life purpose statement. I understand this could involve some internal struggles and you may want some guidance to help along the way. After much self-torture, I found my purpose: To use my capacity to love, my optimism and creativity to inspire and teach others to flourish. Now, every new idea or opportunity gets filtered through this purpose. If it does not serve my purpose, the answer is no.

I teach this process using the character strengths test created by Martin Seligman, PhD, Professor of Psychology at the University of Pennsylvania, combined with lessons from Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits, Jack Canfield’s Success Principles, the Passion Test by Janet and Chris Attwood and my own experience pursuing dreams while helping small business owners find theirs. It is simple, yet the simplicity lives on the far side of complexity. Fortunately, I am passionate about helping people navigate the complexity.  My next article will discuss lessons learned through The Passion Test.

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    Michael Kline

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