Most of us have some natural fear of death or dying. Certainly we have a natural instinct for survival, so it would seem to follow that death would be a failure on our part to successfully survive. I know some of my friends are comfortable with the topic of their own death, but for the sake of this conversation, let’s assume that most people who are working, building careers, businesses and families have no interest in dying. In fact, let's say most of us would be pretty freaked out if we just learned that we have a year to live, or that we were just invaded by aliens who are devouring all the humans in our area. I certainly hate the idea of being served up on a buffet!
It has occurred to me that most people are more afraid of living than of dying. To die is easy. In fact it’s the only thing we all really "have" to do. We can avoid everything else if we are willing to accept the consequences, but dying is the only thing that is not optional as far as we know. Living is hard. To really be alive and be who you are meant to be, who you were when you were born, before your parents, teachers, churches, friends, media and bosses domesticated you into a properly behaved human, completely house-broken and well-mannered and obedient enough to function in normal society. The domestication of humans is built on a system of fear. Our training, since we were just little human pups, has been about fitting in; getting acceptance, approval, love, affirmation. As well-trained big humans, we now live in fear and make decisions based on fear, even when we think we are confident, secure and independent.
To say it, to know it and even to believe it is not the same as to live it. It is hard to live as if we were not in fear. The ego makes us want to deny this, yet we do not go after our real dreams because we fear failure, or we fear success, or we do not think (fear) we are good enough, smart enough, tall enough, educated enough, we do not deserve that much, we do not know enough, people won't believe us, we will seem foolish, we will seem arrogant, we will seem selfish, etc. We do not ask for what we need from those we care about the most at home or at work, because we fear we will be perceived incorrectly, or we fear they may refuse us, or we fear we don't really deserve what we request. We do not give our opinions or share our wisdom because we fear we may be wrong, or we may be the only one thinking a certain way. We don't ask questions because we fear sounding ignorant. We can say we are strong, confident and comfortable, but all our training has taught us to fear everyone and everything and when all else fails, fear god, death and hell. Have I sufficiently gotten you depressed? I have good news.
If we can admit that we have more fear of living than of dying, we can go to work on those fears and start really living! I am so grateful to be able to spend this week in California as one of a hundred students studying success training with Jack Canfield, one of the leading success coaches and trainer in the world. My fellow students include highly successful speakers and trainers from around the world, and some that are closer to the beginning of their journey. There is so much science and so much wisdom available to all of us, to move beyond the fears and self-limiting beliefs to truly transform our lives from merely existing to flourishing.
What are your core character strengths? What are the things you really love to do at work and for fun? What is your highest vision of yourself and your world? If you can answer those questions and string them together, you will have the start of a beautiful personal mission statement. That is something we can work with. That is something to live for. That is something that makes us willing to face fear.
You are smart enough, good enough, talented enough and most of all worthy enough. You can create prosperity, abundance, love and joy in your life. You can do it with your job, your business, family, friends, community and yourself. Now that I think about it, it is my life mission to help you! See? Already you're finding sources for making it happen!
It has occurred to me that most people are more afraid of living than of dying. To die is easy. In fact it’s the only thing we all really "have" to do. We can avoid everything else if we are willing to accept the consequences, but dying is the only thing that is not optional as far as we know. Living is hard. To really be alive and be who you are meant to be, who you were when you were born, before your parents, teachers, churches, friends, media and bosses domesticated you into a properly behaved human, completely house-broken and well-mannered and obedient enough to function in normal society. The domestication of humans is built on a system of fear. Our training, since we were just little human pups, has been about fitting in; getting acceptance, approval, love, affirmation. As well-trained big humans, we now live in fear and make decisions based on fear, even when we think we are confident, secure and independent.
To say it, to know it and even to believe it is not the same as to live it. It is hard to live as if we were not in fear. The ego makes us want to deny this, yet we do not go after our real dreams because we fear failure, or we fear success, or we do not think (fear) we are good enough, smart enough, tall enough, educated enough, we do not deserve that much, we do not know enough, people won't believe us, we will seem foolish, we will seem arrogant, we will seem selfish, etc. We do not ask for what we need from those we care about the most at home or at work, because we fear we will be perceived incorrectly, or we fear they may refuse us, or we fear we don't really deserve what we request. We do not give our opinions or share our wisdom because we fear we may be wrong, or we may be the only one thinking a certain way. We don't ask questions because we fear sounding ignorant. We can say we are strong, confident and comfortable, but all our training has taught us to fear everyone and everything and when all else fails, fear god, death and hell. Have I sufficiently gotten you depressed? I have good news.
If we can admit that we have more fear of living than of dying, we can go to work on those fears and start really living! I am so grateful to be able to spend this week in California as one of a hundred students studying success training with Jack Canfield, one of the leading success coaches and trainer in the world. My fellow students include highly successful speakers and trainers from around the world, and some that are closer to the beginning of their journey. There is so much science and so much wisdom available to all of us, to move beyond the fears and self-limiting beliefs to truly transform our lives from merely existing to flourishing.
What are your core character strengths? What are the things you really love to do at work and for fun? What is your highest vision of yourself and your world? If you can answer those questions and string them together, you will have the start of a beautiful personal mission statement. That is something we can work with. That is something to live for. That is something that makes us willing to face fear.
You are smart enough, good enough, talented enough and most of all worthy enough. You can create prosperity, abundance, love and joy in your life. You can do it with your job, your business, family, friends, community and yourself. Now that I think about it, it is my life mission to help you! See? Already you're finding sources for making it happen!
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