A Romance Worth Pursuing
Conway Daily Sun April 7, 2010
By Michael Kline
Any job can be fulfilling, fun and fruitful, or demeaning, depressing and debt-inducing. If you’ve seen an episode of Undercover Boss, you know what I mean – watching employees cheerfully cleaning port-a-potties with gratitude for example. The show is full of examples of people with a different reference about work; both good and bad. Reality (if there is such a thing), doesn’t matter near as much as your frame of reference for how things are or appear to be. If you’re unemployed, a lousy job might be a motivator because it satisfies an immediate need. However, once a need is satisfied, it is no longer a motivator. Money alone does not motivate a person who is financially comfortable. A bigger title without the authority and responsibility to go with it does not satisfy a person who needs to grow personally or financially. In the long list of things that motivate people, I think their frame of reference drives more decisions than anything else. We can simply change our frame of reference or model of the world if life isn’t going the way we want. I’m not saying to decide to like what you have. I’m saying be grateful for what you have and work with what you’ve got to get what you want.
Let’s say your life was going along just fine ; you did all the things expected of you, finished school, got married, bought a house, had the kids, worked hard, saved when you could, maybe you even started your own business. Then the world changed – you were employed by a company that doesn’t need you now, or customers don’t care about the little guy anymore, your kids hardy need you and your spouse is a jerk. Maybe you’re a service person serving a throw-away society that would rather buy new than have you fix something. What can you do? What’s the frame of reference or model in your mind that tells you what to do? If you’ve come to a negative conclusion about your situation, that is completely understandable; after all, you have reasonable evidence that supports your conclusion. Your frame of reference however, does not need to be based exclusively on your limited personal experience. Other people doing the same things you do, have different experiences and can prove a completely different frame of reference to be just as true as yours. Consider how people use statistics to support their claim to be factually true – you can almost always find more statistics to prove the opposite is also true. So you can use someone else’s frame of reference, which is just as true as yours, to get you going in a positive direction.
Your current situation, even if it appears bleak, provides some hidden opportunity to contribute in some way to advance your personal goals. Force yourself to look for the silver lining in every negative situation - no matter how small, it’s always there. Then ask yourself how you can use the situation to accomplish what you want, and go to work on learning what you need to know to be ready to act on the answer when it comes rushing at you. I promise it will.
Michael Kline is a local retailer and Business Success Coach. He may be reached through his website www.klineseminars.com or email firstname.lastname@example.org